A Celebration of Sexy

While the rest of the sports world focuses on the NFL Conference Championship games and the upcoming Super Bowl, I’m going to break the trend and discuss the most exciting sports topic to hit the scene in years: The Australian Open.

Ok, now that you’ve stopped laughing (or crying), let’s talk some football…

After Rex Grossman turned the ball over four times in a loss to the New England Patriots, Lovie Smith responded to media criticism of Rex by simply saying “Rex is our quarterback…We’re 9-2 with Rex leading our football team.” After Rex Grossman turned the ball over four times in an uninspiring win over the Vikings, Lovie Smith was repeatedly pestered about a quarterback change by the media. He succinctly responded, “Rex is our quarterback…we’re 10-2 with Rex.”

Bears struggle to beat doormat Tampa Bay: Rex is our quarterback. We’re 11-2 with Rex.

Bears lose to Green Bay in the season finale: Rex is our quarterback. We’re 13-3 with Rex.

And on and on it goes…

As the fans and the media cried out for a mutiny, Lovie Smith remained confident in the mercurial – heck to say Grossman is mercurial is an insult to mercurial. We need a revised volatility scale to adequately describe Rex. I think it should go Mercurial, Erratic, Volatile, and finally, Grossmanial – but talented Grossman. Even as I felt myself compelled to doubt Lovie, I felt that I truly understood his decision and think it is one to which all of us can relate:

Rex Grossman is just like your super drunk friend.

You all know who I’m talking about. The guy who’s either the life of the party or starting a fight with the group of big guys at a club when he’s too drunk to stand. You love the guy, because he morphs into the ultimate party stud, but you’re always worried that he’s going to fire off eight too many Vodka shots and wind up sprawled on the center of the dance floor. He’s a great guy, but you never know which guy’s going to come out: the party stud who’s quick firing rounds of Jager shots and bringing scores of hot girls to your table, or the guy who ends up vomiting on himself in the bathroom while ripping the sink off the wall. Everybody loves the guy, but you’re just a little nervous about bringing him to formal functions. Now, with the Bears headed to the Super Bowl, critics continue to pile on Rex. Some even suggest that Rex is “the worst quarterback to ever play in a Super Bowl”. But he’s not, he’s just your super drunk friend. And with that in mind, what do I have to say to the doubters who say the Bears can’t win the Super Bowl with Rex Grossman?

Rex is our quarterback. We’re 15-3 with Rex.

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Championship Weekend Thoughts…

Bears vs. Saints

Does it get any sweeter for Rex Grossman, then sharing a knowing smile with 4-time Super Bowl winner Terry Bradshaw as he talks about the screaming fans? “Listen to them,” Bradshaw said. “The're loving you now!"

Reggie Bush effectively ended this game with that stupid, stupid finger wag at Brian Urlacher en route to his 88 yard touchdown catch. After that point, Bears 23 – Saints 0.

After the game Bush had this to say about his immature celebration. "I know I made a mistake. I apologized to my coach and my teammates," Bush said. "But I'm not going to kill myself over it." Don't worry Reggie, Urlacher will handle that for you.
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In classic Urlacher form, Brian offered this glib gem when asked what he thought about Bush’s actions. "I think we're going to the Super Bowl."

I also couldn’t help but laugh when Urlacher was asked “How fast is Reggie Bush.” He donned his quintessential Urlacher scowl and said “He’s fast. Not fast enough.”

Say what you want about Rex Grossman, but he went 4/4 as he led the Bears on an 85 yard drive, in which he completed passes of 12, 13, 20 and 33 yards.
Sunday’s game was like a “Best of Grossman” game. We got to see Bad Rex (QB Rating of 39.9 in the first half) and Good Rex (QB Rating of 105.4 in the second half). Are we sure he doesn’t have multiple personalities disorder?

Lovie Smith, master of perspective: “I'd feel even better to be the first African American coach to hold up the Super Bowl trophy”

After the game, Senator Barrack Obama summed up exactly why I respect Lovie so much and why he’ll be getting my vote for Presdient. “Obviously, to see two African-American coaches go to the Super Bowl…is terrific. But you know what makes it even better is that they are both men of humility, they are both men of God…It is a wonderful story, not just for African-Americans but for all Americans to see men like that who are good fathers, who are good leaders, who do things the right way, succeed."

The NFL recently decided to make hovering a penalty

Bernard Berrian can fly. Literally.

After last season’s bitter playoff loss to Carolina, where the Bears failed to adjust their defense to stop Steve Smith, I have held the belief that our coaching staff was incapable of making good half-time adjustments. After watching the Bears absolutely dominate the Saints after giving up two long touchdown drives, I’m here to say mea culpa.

Here to further that point is Defensive Coordinator Ron Rivera: "We said we first had to identify the positions [Bush] was in, who he was in the game with and where he was aligned.” Ok, the Bears can make adjustments.

And you thought you and your friends were excited after the Bears won? Charles Tillman had 23 Text Messages and 17 missed calls after the game.

Don’t believe that the Bears are the most well rounded team (Offense, Defense, Special Teams) in the NFL? You might want to take that up with Brad Maynard, whose seven punts boomed for a 47.4-yard average, including three inside the 20.

I don’t know why the NFL insists on only staging the Super Bowl in warm weather climates. The snow added an almost magic quality to the game. Truly football, as it was meant to be played.

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Colts vs. Patriots

I hate to say I told you so – Who am I kidding? I love saying that – but the AFC Championship game was freakishly similar to my prediction. In fact, the game was a near mirror image of the Yankees-Red Sox series in 2004. The long standing favorite (Patriots / Yankees) got out to an incredible lead (21-3 / 3 games to 0) against their bitter rival (Colts / Red Sox), only to watch hopelessly as their rival made a historic comeback to win (Overcoming 18 point deficit / Overcoming 3-0 series lead). After Asante Samuel picked off Payton Manning for a touchdown, one of my good friends, who is a die-hard Colts fan, couldn’t watch any more and went outside. When the Colts kicked the field goal at halftime to close to within 21-6, I was able to convince them to come back inside by assuring them that the Colts we’re about to repeat history and stage a historic comeback.

I know Tom Brady gets a free pass for his three Super Bowl rings, but if Manning and thrown that interception at the end of the game, we’d all be calling him a choke artist.

Manning displayed a new face!

Why don’t people like the Patriots? Maybe it has something to do with the classy way that Bill Belicheck blew off Payton Manning after the game and refused to credit him for his performance in the post-game press conference.

I know that LaDanian Tomlinson thought that the Patriots displayed a lack of class when they celebrated on the San Diego logo after their defeat of the Chargers, but I thought that the Patriots showed a lot of class by not crying on the Colts logo after the loss.

Going in to this game, what were the chances that Patriots and Colts lineman outscored the entire Saints team? (21-14)

Either Reche Caldwell has a thyroid problem or someone needs to switch to decaf.

Since my parents are Hawkeye Alumni, I am obligated to point out that the two biggest non-Payton threats on the Colts vs. Patriots were graduates of the University of Iowa. Big Hawkeye salute to Dallas Clark and Bob Sanders.

Now where is that Adam's apple?

Say what you want about Tom Brady’s Super Bowl rings, calmness under pressure, and Hollywood dating credentials, but Gisele is a MAN, baby!

Say want you want about the infallible Patriots front office, but Deion Branch would have caught those two dropped passes and the Patriots would have been in the Super Bowl.

We need a name for this instant classic victory. The 49ers' 28-27 win over the Cowboys was dubbed “The Catch”, the Broncos' 23-20 overtime win over the Browns in 1986 gave us “The Drive”, maybe one day, we’ll refer to this ultimate comeback as “the Heimlich”.

Touching Payton Manning’s helmet is what constitutes roughing the passer these days? What’s next, illegal glaring?

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Random Thoughts

Not only do we now have two African American coaches in the Super Bowl, but both of them thoroughly out-coached their Caucasian counterparts.

Feeling like an idiot that his never occurred to me, but Brick from Anchorman is thusly named for being “dumb as a brick”.

Happy 19th Birthday Greg Oden. In the words of Tony Kornheiser: “Greg Oden has just gone from the oldest looking 18 year old to the oldest looking 19 year old.”

Congratulations, Jonathan Joseph! You’re the ninth member of the Bengals to get arrested in as many months. Let’s see if we can make it an easy 10 out of 10.

Seriously, 9 out of 52 members of the Bengals were arrested this year? If that happened at my job, it would be the equivalent of 260 out of 1500 bank employee getting arrested in the past nine months.

Apparently, Bill Belicheck learned his class from Bill Parcells, who decided to steal the headlines from the deserving Colts and Bears by announcing his retirement the day after the championship games. Good riddance.

Microsoft just announced that LeBron James will became the first basketball player to promote a Microsoft product, the upcoming Windows Vista. Microsoft felt this was a perfect match because both are largely over-hyped products that will score points with style, but won’t defend you from any threats.

Most recent sign of the Apocalypse for the Raiders: Even I turned down the Raiders Head Coaching job.

The New Yankees

DISCLAIMER: For the first time in my fledgling Journalism endeavor, I’ve been scooped. The Sports Guy, Bill Simmons, just posted his weekly article on ESPN.com discussing the exact same story I’ve been working on this week. I got the idea on Thursday while reading the comments of Patriot fans on an Sports Illustrated Football Blog (See the story here), but before I had a chance to finish and post my story, Simmons rode in to steal my thunder. Unfortunately, I only told my idea to two people, my wife and my buddy, fellow Chicago sports enthusiast Matt Kolsky (who writes an NBA blog and publishes a weekly podcast, both of which rock), so aside from the testimony of my friends and the created date of the Microsoft Word document I used to write the story, I have no admissible evidence validating the originality of my idea. You will have to take my word that I came up with the idea independent of my favorite sports columnist, but I know how suspicious that sounds. I decided not to read Simmons’s work before finishing my own article, so hopefully we’ll approach the subject from two different angles and my work won’t seem derivative. Now, without further ado, let’s get it on!

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Everyone hates Yankee fans.

Scratch that. Everyone used to hate Yankee Fans.

Chicks dig the long ball? I thought chicks dug the post-season strikeout?

That was before Boston shocked the world with their stunning come from behind ALCS victory and subsequent World Series title. Since then, Yankee fans don’t have quite the same veracity they once did. Their smug attitudes and condescending dismissal of other franchises have notably lessened. Their delight in the play of golden boy Derek Jeter and constant mockery of the rival Red Sox have similarly waned. They used to taunt Sox fans with cheers of “1915” – the last year the Red Sox had won a World Series – and summarily dismiss any notion of the Sox, or anyone else for that matter, beating them in the playoffs. Now they endure the mockery of opposing fans, while their team continually falters in the playoffs. The thrill of Jeter has been replaced by the agony of A-Rod. The constant winning replaced by perpetual post-season collapse. Worst of all, they have to suffer through the taunts of their hated rivals, the Red Sox fans, whose rabid intensity has reach unparallel heights due to their storybook ascent from their role as red headed step child to the Yanks. But, why bring this up now, in the heart of the NFL playoffs?

Because history is repeating itself.

The modern NFL is supposed to be dynasty proof. The salary cap and revenue sharing are designed to hinder any team from stockpiling excessive talent and winning year after year. Yet, somehow the New England Patriots, behind their slovenly football savant, Bill Belicheck, and confident trigger man, Tom Brady, have won three of the last five Super Bowls and are on the verge of winning another this year. During this time, they have transformed from loveable underdogs to the team that everyone loves to hate. Whether it’s Tom Brady up at a podium smiling like he just slept with your daughter, talking about how he doesn’t get any respect – Tom, if you got any more respect you’d be the Godfather – or Bill Belicheck making off hand comments about his genius – Seriously, can we as a country stop our cavalier usage of genius? Bill Belicheck is not a genius. Karl Rove is not a genius. Shakespeare was a genius. Einstein was a genius.

Guinness Draught in a bottle? BRILLIANT!

Hell, I’d be willing to concede that the guy who invented Guinness draught in a bottle is a genius, but these days it seems that any two bit hack with a few decent ideas is a genius. Easy there hyperbole nation. – the Patriots exude an aura of infallibility and a cocksure bravado that has transformed from a quiet confidence to full blown hubris. Along the way, the fans of the New England Patriots, the same fans that root for the Boston Red Sox, and constantly complained about the arrogance and haughtiness of the Yankee Fans, have become the football equivalent of their hated rivals. Take a quick look at any internet message board and you’ll see scores of ardent Patriot supporters posting messages such as:

“Here it is plain and simple: Who has the superbowl rings? BRADY, 3 to be exact.
Enough Said. Pats WIN!!!”

“Someone would have to be an idiot to bet against Tom Brady in a playoff game no matter where it's played.”

“Pats could beat the Colts on the Moon if it was a playoff game. Dungy/Manning VS. Belichick/Brady - Nuff said...”

“It's hard to play quarterback with both hands wrapped around your throat. Here's a guarantee, Colts fans: Peyton will choke. Like he always does. That overrides everything else.”

Rather then argue about football, they just point to their previous championships. No logic. No debate. They’re just going to win because they always win. Now as a logical man, I’ll be the first to admit that history is a good indicator of the future, but as any investor will tell you history is no guarantee of future performance. Michael Jordan broke up the Pistons dynasty, the Red Sox broke up the Yankees dynasty, market forces burst the dot com bubble and this Sunday, Payton Manning and the Colts are going to tear down the wall of the Patriots dominance. Then on Monday, Patriot fans will wake up and realize that they’ve become the very thing they hate the most and swore to never become, but by then it will be too late.

Say hello to the New Yankees.

A Year in Review

As 2006 comes to a close and we usher in the year of James Bond (2-007), I wanted to take a look back at the year in sports and hand out some awards to the teams, athletes and moments for which 2006 will always be remembered. Ladies and Gentleman, allow me to present the first annual J-Borhood Golden Pineapple Awards.

(Note: The more I think about it, the more I think “Golden Pineapple Award” sounds kind of sissy; like a mango infused piña colada served in a hollowed out pineapple or something. With that in mind, I’ll buy a drink – think top shelf, people – for the person who can come up with the best name for the Annual J-Borhood awards.)

Sack of Hammers Award: Charlie Casserly, ex-GM of the Houston Texans

The ignoble Sack of Hammers Award is presented to the sports figure who best personifies the phrase, “dumb as a sack of hammers”.

Sam Bowie's career was as long as his shorts...

As funny as it sounds, deciding on the winner of this award was one of the most difficult decisions. Truth be told, there were an incredible number of deserving candidates. Barry Bonds continued his plodding quest towards infamy, Bode Miller crashed and burned on the world’s biggest stage, Floyd Landis injected himself with a steroid that takes weeks before taking effect with one week left in the Tour de France, Isaiah Thomas and Matt Millen continued their ongoing struggle for the title of Worst GM in sports and TO continued to act a fool in a way that only TO can. Yet one man dared to stand below these clowns and make the biggest mistake since the Portland Trail Blazers selected Sam Bowie instead of Michael Jordan. Charlie Casserly decided to go against conventional wisdom, non-conventional wisdom, common sense, his sense of sight and the laws of Physics when he drafted Defensive End, Mario Williams ahead of the human highlight film, Reggie Bush and hometown hero and NFL Offensive Rookie of the Year winner Vince Young. Congratulations Mr. Casserly, your mind numbing stupidity earns you a place of honor in the J-Borhood winners…err, losers circle.

The Bare Kunckle Award: Zinedine Zidane, French National Soccer Team

The Bare Knuckle Award is presented to the sports figure who delivered the best knockout blow of the year.

I would appreciate it if you didn't talk about my mother like that

While Carmelo Anthony made a late year push to win this award for his sissy girl slap of Knick’s rookie Mardy Collins – if only for the unintentional comedic value of a thuggish Basketball star slapping someone and the subsequently running like a bitch – this award unquestionably goes to Zinedine Zidane for his headbutt of Marco Matterazzi during the World Cup finals. In fact, I’m not sure that I have or will ever see a better knockout blow during a sporting event in my lifetime. (For the record, this slides ahead of Kyle Farnsworth’s takedown of Paul Wilson in the pantheon of great sports violence.) The world’s best soccer player knocking out an opponent with a headbutt during overtime of the World Cup was the sporting equivalent of Michael Jordan punching Byron Russell in the face instead of sinking the game winning jumper in his last game to win the NBA Finals. I haven’t been this stunned while watching a sporting event since Mike Tyson bit off Evander Holyfield’s ear. Yet, while Tyson’s outbreak was an act of sheer lunacy, Zidane’s smash was leveled in response to Matterazzi allegedly calling his mom and sister Algerian Terrorists. Was it stupid and shortsighted? Yes. Did it cost his team the World Cup and permanently tarnish his legacy? Probably. Yet it firmly cemented him as an immortal bad ass and made Americans realize that all soccer players aren’t a bunch of pussies. Nice work, Zizu!

The Fluke Victory Award: St. Louis Cardinals, for winning the World Series

The Fluke Victory Award goes to the sports figure or team that wins has the biggest fluke win or season of the year .

The Cardinals don't deserve a picture

Couldn't resist taking one last crack at the worst World Series team in the history of baseball.

The Oh S*** Award: - Kobe Bryant scoring 81 points against the Raptors

The Oh S*** Award goes to the sports figure most responsible for regressing the world’s vocabulary to two words…

Mamba is a bad mother...watch your mouth

This award was a battle between four equally worthy contestants – Zidane, for his headbutt, Vince Young, for his overall play in the Rose Bowl, Devin Hester, for his return of a missed field goal for a touchdown and Kobe Brant, for his 81 point game against the Raptors – but in the end, it became a battle between Devin Hester and Kobe Bryant. Zidane’s headbutt was the most shocking play, but it lacked athletic amazement. Vince Young played the game of the year, but there wasn’t one moment that truly left you in a state of shock. On the flip side, Devin Hester’s run back left me running around the inside of Ryan’s Bar and Grill like Genghis Khan (much to the delight of the staff, I’m sure) and frantically calling every family member and Bear’s fan I knew to talk about what I’d just seen. In similar fashion, Kobe’s game was so over the top, I watched the replay 3 separate times and found myself glued to the seat and cheering “Mamba, Mamba!” throughout the fourth quarter. As a lifelong Bulls fan I watched Michael Jordan play for 13 years – the two years in Washington never happened – and I never saw him put on a pure scoring display like Kobe’s game. Truly stunning. I came close to making this award a tie, but in the end I gave the award to Kobe for making a run at a record (Wilt Chamberlain’s 100 point game) people had long considered an untouchable relic.

Clench Your Butt Cheeks Award: Barbaro, for breaking his leg in the Preakness

The Clench Your Butt Cheeks Award goes to the sports figure who suffers the most shocking and bizarre injury of the year.

Trust me, we're better off without the picture

This was the easiest award to give out. By far. I decided to watch the Kentucky Derby for the first time ever this year, if for no other reason, it provided a great excuse to drink Mint Juleps at 10 in the morning. At the beginning of the race, I was mildly interested at best, but as the race progressed, I couldn’t shake the feeling that I was watching history in the making. Barbaro obliterated the field and had the look of the first Triple Crown winner in almost 30 years. I was so enamored with his speed, grace and power that I decided to watch horse racing again (truly a landmark event). Unfortunately, as Barbaro rocketed from the gates in the Preakness, he suffered the most paintful, butt clenching injury I’ve ever seen. Watching Barbaro’s leg shatter again and again and again (seriously, did we need to replay it 75 times? Says the guy who watched 75 replays…) was gut wrenching. The J-Borhood sends their best wishes and prayers to Barbaro, the horse that almost made horse racing relevant for me.

Homer Award: Devin Hester, Colt Brennan (tie)

The Homer Award goes to the sports figure on whom I have the biggest man crush.

What does Devin's front look like? The world may never know.

I can’t remember a year where two athletes burst into my sporting world in such breathtaking fashion. Colt Brennan smashed the all-time NCAA passing record and single handedly made UH football relevant again. Devin Hester established himself as the most electrifying player in the NFL as he ran into the record books not once, but twice, tying the NFL record for longest run back and setting the record for most returns in a season. Both of these players deserved full articles venerating their virtues, but unfortunately, both rocked my collective universe during a down time in my blog writing and thus their exploits remain vacant from the J-Borhood’s hallowed ground. But Colt and Devin had so many unbelievable moments that it would be silly to try and summarize their collective accomplishments here. I hereby promise to write full length articles on both men at the nearest opportunity. (Note: All bets are off if Colt declares for the NFL draft. Don’t do it Colt. I know the millions and fame are enticing, but what about starring in your very own J-Borhood article. You can’t put a price on that.)

Cinderella Award: George Mason

The Cinderella Award goes to the sports figure who shocks the world and wins one for the little guy.

Millions of bracket owners were not quite as happy

Not be confused with the old boss of CTU, (If you don’t understand the reference, it’s from 24 aka God’s gift to Television. If you have not started watching 24 yet, what are you waiting for? Stop reading this right now, call in sick to work and go buy the first two seasons. You’ll thank me later.) this small school from Washington DC (Note: I actually had to look that up.) single handedly destroyed 90% of America’s brackets with their improbable run to the Final Four. People that claim they put George Mason in the Final Four are either George Mason alumni or liars. What made their tournament run especially amazing was that they knocked off tournament favorite Connecticut, whose team had three first round NBA draft picks in the starting lineup. Furthermore, their victory even had monumental ramifications during this year’s college football season. (Stay with me.)

First off, the President of GMU placed a full page ad in the Boise newspaper, wishing Boise State luck and imploring them to carry the banner of the underdog proudly in their BCS bowl game against Oklahoma. Needless to say Boise State cashed in on this much needed luck by converting on 4th and 18 with a hook and ladder play and then scoring a two point conversion on the Statue of Liberty play. Next, by knocking off Connecticut, George Mason paved the way for Florida to win the National Championship. In their victory speech the Florida players announced that they would forgo the NBA draft to comeback and defend their title and urged the football team to win the national title. Flash forward nine months and the Gators rode this wave of pride to an overwhelming victory over season long #1 Ohio State to become the first ever University to hold the National Basketball and Football championships at the same time. And to think, Boise and Florida have George Mason to thank. Who knew?

The J-Borhood extends a hearty congratulations to tiny GMU for shaking up the national landscape in not only basketball, but football as well. Truly a Cinderella story.

J-Borhood Athlete of the Year: Vince Young

Vince celebrates winning J-Borhood Athlete of the Year

Sports Illustrated picked Dwayne Wade. The Associated Press picked Tiger Woods. I’m hear to tell you that they’re crazy. This was the year of Vince Young. Everybody else was just along for the ride.

He started the year by single handedly beating USC, a team that people were tabbing as the greatest college football team of all-time, by passing for 267 and rushing for 200 yards, including the game winning scramble on 4th down to secure the national championship for the University of Texas. To put those numbers in perspective, I spent the entirety of 2006 playing NCAA Football on my Playstation 2 and I still haven’t duplicated them. What’s even crazier, is that the numbers don’t tell the whole story. Vince put on a transcendent performance that has to be seen to be believed. He was literally unstoppable and left the entire nation breathless.

Somehow, between that game and the NFL draft, people started to forget about how Vince Young took a nation’s breath away and started to focus on unfair comparisons to Michael Vick, a low Wonderlick score and the silly notion that his game wouldn’t translate in the NFL. I know because I was one of those people. And boy, do I feel stupid.

Vince Young took over an 0-3 Tennessee Titans team, which NFL pundits left for dead, and led them on a stretch of 6 straight wins and within a game of making the playoffs the playoffs. Along the way he continued to display his amazing elusiveness and never ending will to win. He led a 4th quarter comeback against Payton Manning and the Colts, staged the largest 4th quarter comeback in franchise history with a 24 points against the Giants, and ran for a 39 yard touchdown in overtime to seal a win against his hometown Houston Texans, who bypassed him in the draft. Throughout this incredible season, critics continued to issue Vince backhanded compliments saying “Vince Young just wins football games”, as if he lacked the necessary skills but somehow found a way to win. Well I’ll say it right here, once and for all. If someone can find me a more important skill for an NFL Quarterback then the ability to win football games, I’m all ears.

Keep it up Vince. The J-Borhood will be watching.

Well everyone, it’s been a wonderful first year in the J-Borhood and I’m excited to keep things rolling into the New Year. Make sure to let me know if I missed any awards!

Finally, mahalo for your continued support of my wild ramblings. Here’s a few quick thoughts to tide you over:

• Let’s review Barry Bonds mentality in the face of his failed amphetamine test, which he blamed on a substance he took from teammate Mark Sweeney’s locker. He’s vehemently anti-performance enhancing drugs, but pro-lying, pro-stealing and all for dragging a teammate through the mud. Nice work, Barry.
• After the Sixers decided to buy out the remaining 43 million of his contract, Chris Webber has declared that he wants to sign with the Heat, Pistons, Lakers, Mavs or Spurs. What a coincidence Chris, so do I.
• Quips from my brother while watching the Budweiser Sponsored aerial coverage of the National Championship game: “Why do we need aerial coverage? The game is in a dome!”
• Further quip from an unnamed hyperbole prone friend at the game, after watching Troy Smith slide to avoid a hit. “I hate Quarterback’s that slide more then anything in the world.” Anything, I asked. “Yep. Genocide in Sudan? Secondary to Quarterback’s that slide.”
• With all due respect to Justin Timberlake, I brought sexy back a long time ago.